Invitation

Everyone's invited to enter my wOrld :-)

If you are a dreamer, come in.
If you are a dreamer, a wisher, a liar, a hoper, a prayer, a magic bean buyer...
If you're a pretender, come sit by my fire!
For we have some flax-golden tales to spin.
Come in! Come in!

-Shel Silverstein

Chinatown

I'm in Boston's Chinatown right now and I'm just...in awe at how beautifully eclectic it is. The style of dress, the archetecture, the smell of orange chicken, the different types of people rushing by....it's just a really nice change of scenary. It's even more beautiful than I remember.

Today is such a gloomy day. It's raining so of course most people are looking as depressing as the weather. But even in this atmosphere I've found something to appreciate. Stop and smell the figurative roses wOrld...

Confessions of an Insomniac

When this zoo quiets down and it's just me and my own echo
Most nights I don't even sleep
When everyone else is catching Z's, I'm up alone with my thoughts.
I just let the days run together like watercolors now,
painting a picture I myself can't even see
Because nothing is certain besides the fact that I need things to get better than this...and fast.

Sometimes I think I'm from a different planet than everybody else. I'm not built like you, we don't see the same.
Most days it doesn't even bother me, but some nights it creeps into my thoughts and I wonder if I'll ever find anybody who will understand me or really get what I'm about.

I used to think he did. I used to...
He was my passion, my pleasure, my pain. And I loved him.
But that chapter of my life is closed now. Back to regular scheduled programming...

Untitled

I never wanted to save the world, only to change a life
and I never wanted to live forever, I'd be content being loved forever
I've given up on knowing everything, I just want to believe in something...
But in my course to know emotion, I ended up with no emotion
I've seen everything but I understand nothing...

Miracles

People usually consider walking on water or on thin air a miracle. But I think the real miracle is not to walk either on water or on thin air but to walk on Earth. Everyday we are engaged in a miracle which we don't even recognise: a blue sky, white clouds, green leaves, the black, curious eyes of a child...our own two eyes. All is a miracle.

-Thich Nhat Hanh

True Religion

"Follow me for a few days. Watch what I do, how I walk, what I say and how I conduct myself generally. THAT is my religion."
-Mahatma Gandhi

What About the Thief in Your Mind?

“Don't become a victim of yourself. Forget about the thief waiting in the alley; what about the thief in your mind?”
-Jim Rohn

It is so easy to become a victim of our own thoughts- a victim of our own negative thinking. And many of us don't even realize we're victims. So worried about talking shit and paying attention to everyone else that we aren't paying enough attention to ourselves.

From personal experience I've realized that if you don't support yourself and your dreams first-no one else will. When I wake up in the morning, the first person who asks me how I am always gets a 'great!'- even if I'm not as enthused as I sound. Why you ask? It's simple. If I don't think I'm great how can I expect anybody else to?

I used to think that I needed validation for everything I did. When I got straight A's I was expecting a 'good job'. When I graduated high school I expected a pat on the back. Most of that shit never came. It's not that my family and friends weren't proud or anything...naa, I don't think that was it. They were just doing their own thing. But I resented them for casting a shadow on my shine-I turned myself into a victim of my thoughts by thinking that they didn't care, that I needed to go harder to show and prove. In a twisted way it motivated me to do better...but it also forever fucked up relationships because deep down I felt like they didn't give a fuck. They weren't there when I thought I needed their support. They left me to do me for better or for worse. Don't get me wrong though-with certain individuals in particular there was animoisity over my success. Certain kinds of people subscribe to the 'crabs in a barrel' mentality. They wanna climb on top of you to put themselves in a new position, claw and pinch at you and pull you down when they see you pulling ahead. Those type of people are wolves in sheep clothing and it's up to us to point 'em out and shake 'em fast.

But what I'm speaking on today is the idea that we ourselves need to be our own cheerleaders. We run into these dream killers who listen to our dreams and aspirations and make it their duty to destroy them as best they can. Damn frenemies. Fuck them! Fuck the thieves in the alleys and kill the thief in your mind. Don't set yourself up for failure by thinking that you can't do shit, that you can't accomplish what you want to acheive. Don't ever let anybody steal your dream because my dream is the only thing in this universe that keeps me breathing. Family has let me down, men have hurt me, I'm best friend-less. But my dream, my dream has been rockin' with me since I was 9 years old. Now that it's almost time for me to graduate college and put my thoughts to fruition I don't expect shit. Hell, part of me doesn't even want them to pay attention. I do what I do for me now. I don't need anyone's acknowledgement or approval. As long as Laniesha's happy with Laniesha everything will be good. “Don't become a victim of yourself. Forget about the thief waiting in the alley; what about the thief in your mind?”

Just some daily randomness <3

Dreamer, dream no more.

"I walked beside the evening sea
And dreamed a dream that could not be
The waves that plunged along the shore said only: "Dreamer, dream no more!"
-Madam Marie Curie